Jon Lester is the Chuck Norris of Baseball.

Jon Lester is 24 years old and has already achieved more than most people do in an entire lifetime. He has pitched in the winning game of the World Series, beat Cancer (which began during his career in the majors), and he thrown a 130-pitch no-hitter, which was only the 17th in Red Sox History.

 Jon’s story is the stuff of legend, and it is only a matter of time before boastful statements about him drift their way around the internets. You may remember the endless list of “Chuck Norris Facts” that gained popularity several years ago. They may have been a little over the top, but, truly, if there were a list of “Jon Lester Facts” they would read something like this…

Jon Lester pitches left handed because Major League Baseball has deemed the right one too powerful.

Jon Lester only loads the bases to practice getting himself out of jams- and to drive the ladies wild.

Jon Lester once stopped a steal simply by asking the runner not to. He listed because he had so much respect for Jon Lester.

 

He may be no “Texas Ranger” but this Red Sox Hottie has pitched his way into my heart. Man, that was cheesy. I apologize.

 

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2 Comments

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2 responses to “Jon Lester is the Chuck Norris of Baseball.

  1. Don Legere

    Jon Lester is the Chuck Norris of Baseball.

    Jon Lester pitches left handed because Major League Baseball has deemed the right one too powerful.

    Jon Lester only loads the bases to practice getting himself out of jams

    Jon Lester once struck out Arod in Yankee Stadium, he was pitching in Fenway.

    Jon Lester can also play shortstop. MLB wont let him because he can catch as well as he throws… and that “just wouldn’t be fair”.

    Jon Lester once threw a pitch so well the Umpire gave him all 3 strikes at once.

    Once a reporter asked Big Papi: “what is your favorite color?”. He replyed. “Jon Lester”

    Jon Lester’s confidence can be seen from outer space.

    Jon Lester was once considered as a replacement for the Patriot missile system.

    Jon Lester could have thrown a perfect game but he wanted to “get his work in”.

    Jon Lester has so many pitches that MLB ran out of names. They just call them Frank, Bill, Tom…

    Jon Lester once threw a pitch so fast that it went back in time and struck out Jerry Remy.

    MLB is thinking of making Jon Lester a banned substance.

    Jon Lester pitched so well once in Anaheim that the Red Sox won 5 to -3

    Jon Lester is accurate to 1/1000 of a human hair.

    An umpire once said to Jon Lester: “Slow it down a little so I can see it.”

    Jon Lester pitches so well he was almost voted NBA Most Valuable Player.

    Jon Lester only lets people on base to break up the monotony.

    Jon Lester has a pitch so fast they had to call it the “Wicked Fastball”.

    Jon Lester once threw a slider with so much movement that it took a left on to Yawkee way. The ball was last seen on the Mass Pike heading towards Stockbridge.

    While they put Arod on a box of Wheaties, They put Jon Lester on boxes of dynamite.

  2. thegirlinthestands

    That’s awesome… just awesome.

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